Graeme "Wingnut" Burton

Short, round goalie, occasional Franco Baresi-like sweeper and cricketing legend with years of experience skippering his 2nd team young lions. His 20-year Village career began in the early 1990s. The naughty ‘Nut was a dynamic presence on the field with his Mark Ealham-style medium pacers and hard-hitting batting. Equally as dynamic off the pitch, Nutty attacked the curry houses of North London with relish and was a mercurial presence in the Claddagh. Famed for his “Let's drink till the sun comes up” comment before falling asleep on a bar stool 10 minutes later, Nut found love with Sharon and now lives happily ever after in Australia.

Bob Smith
Bobby - or Bonehead - was a correct opening batter with a long forward stride, which he used to good effect to blunt many an opening bowling attack in the ‘80s and ‘90s. Bobby was a social gardener, popular with his customers and, latterly, a solicitor and an all-round great guy. Always kind, Bobby loved a pint and used to bring his guitar to select away fixtures and entertain the troops. Bob made his name as part of The Skiff Skats, a North London hillbilly/country band founded with his brother Pete "Pigmeat" Smith. In 2019, Robert sadly died of cancer and is missed by all who knew him.

Bruce Maclachlan
The late, great Brucie was an obdurate left-handed batsman from the mid-1980s to early ‘90s who wore thick horned-rim glasses and had a loud laugh that could be heard across the room. Brucie loved his ale and drank from his own pint mug. Famous for ferrying his teammates to away games, he'd travel at high speeds with Led Zeppelin and other rock artists blaring from the stereo.

Felix Charles

“Time, Felix” are words no footballer ever used twice in Felix's company. After hearing the instruction, casual full back “Felix the Cat” would sit back, relax and watch the world go by, causing carnage around him. Better known on the cricket pitch for his dynamic fielding and Caribbean flair when batting, Felix is a much-loved Village legend who joined the club in the 1980s and was still playing for the 1st XI more than three decades later. His reluctant karaoke on a stag do lives long in the memory. Cat, we salute you!

Henry Latin
An inspiration for the older generation of cricketers, Henry performed magnificently in the lower village cricketing sides during the late 1980s to early ‘90s despite his advancing years. An obdurate bat, Henry bowled deceptive off-spin using flight and guile to lure batsmen into his trap.

Andy Pullen
One half of the Village’s version of the Nevilles, Andy is now happily settled in Ipswich. A crafty right-arm away swing bowler who rocked up in the 1980s, AP was a master slogger with his wagon wheel heavily weighted towards midwicket. AP was also a resilient centre-half in the mould of Terry Butcher, who headed balls for fun. AP scored one of the greatest own goals in history past his brother from 30 yards, which caused the temporary halt to a Village football match as the team erupted into fits of giggles.

Vince Holohan
What can you say about Vince (pictured above centre, with Matthew Webster [left] and Gary Topp) in three paragraphs? With so much to say, we've decided to fill this tribute with some of his catchphrases that generations enjoyed from his football and cricket playing days to his coaching days and beyond. Vince joined the club around 1970 and is now enjoying retirement in Australia with his beloved Elaine; we're sure he is treating those Down Under to some of his classic one-liners....

“Never con a conner”
“I don't share pal”
“Core blimey pal”
“I'll have a chapati to mop it up with pal”
“'Get me two”

Roger Cowden
Another footballing legend, 1970s first-team football manager Roger Cowden was fondly remembered for his resemblance to Bruce Forsyth and his catchphrases “Mamma Mia,” “Do the good things not the bad” and more.

Chalky Cara
The man with 15 grips of a cricket ball, like Benjamin Button he just gets younger. Chalks was a dynamic leader in both football and cricket in the 1990s and noughties, able to pull in players at 10 minutes' notice - most of whom were very capable of playing 8 levels higher. Nicknamed “The Menace” for his unpredictable behaviour on nights out, Melvin was a printer by trade and produced fantastic fixture books for many years before retiring to the golf circuit. Interesting Melvin Cara fact… he has only ever worn socks in public twice.

Mike “Sacksy” Plowright
Questions about how he got his nickname were quickly answered by his 'low hanging fruit' in a post-game shower. Mike was a twin with his brother Bruce, equally as enigmatic. He bowled aggressive medium pace in the early ‘90s, bore an uncanny resemblance to Skeletor and had deep inside pockets in his trench coat that could comfortably hold a Duncan Fearnley Magnum and was famed for his catchphrase, which he shouted regularly from the boundary: “Hit ‘em for 6.”

Wayne Sizer

Tearaway fast bowler and gentle giant in the 1990s, not exactly University Challenge material. When quizzed in Mill Hill Tandoori about his favourite film, Wayne sat back, reflected and said, “A movie that has hidden meaning and leaves you to reflect.” When asked if he could give an example, Wayne responded: “Terminator.” Along with Felix and Vince, Wayne was picked in a Burtonhole Lane all-time XI in 2023.

12th man: Bertie Regardo
“Who is Bertie Regardo?” was the talk of the Village for weeks after Perry Clark identified him in a photo that identified World Cup legends who had attended Burtonhole Lane as part of a Phoenix from the Flames skit in David Baddiel and Frank Skinner’s “Fantasy Football League.” The mysterious Regardo was later identified as an error: Clark had mistakenly read the part signed "Best regards" by a Brazilian footballing legend.

Squad members
Chuck Connors, Simmo, Jeff Khan, Charlie Cotton, Disco, Lynton “Porno” Brewer and Tommy G

Umpire: Roger Ram
Rag trade Rog shook off his business memories with Philip Green to become a reliable Village umpire in the early ‘90s. Renowned for being quick off the mark, Rog saw off many an opposition batter with a wry smile and a raised finger.

About the author: Simon Martindill joined Mill Hill Village as a 12-year-old cricketer when Les the cabbie, dad of the 'Nut, took him to Friday night training. He was part of the Village team that won the under-17 county cup and also played football for the Village. Off the pitch, he was the football secretary for several years and absolutely loved everything about the Village.

Have your say
Which Burtonhole Lane legends are missing from our list? We’d like you to post your selection in the comments on our Facebook page, along with any personal anecdotes about the players you’ve chosen.

80th anniversary match vs Sutton CC
Mill Hill Village Cricket Club turns back the clock for a special 80th anniversary friendly match against Sutton Cricket Club on Sunday, May 17 at Burtonhole Lane. All are welcome. Visit our dedicated page for more stories about the club's history at Burtonhole Lane.